Silence is Golden

If I am silent then I am not real

If I speak up then no one will hear
If I wear a mask there's somewhere to hide

Silence is Golden
I have been broken
Safe in my own skinSo nobody wins

-Garbage-

There are some pains too deep to speak about. Some wounds, some h

urts so cutting that even thinking about them is not a possibility. They lie there, at the back of your mind, untouched but always present. So you tip-toe through life, afraid of thinking, of feeling, of remembering, because you know that any wrong move might set them off and those pain-bombs might burst and cause havoc on your fr

agile being.

This is what both “So Much to Tell You” by John Marsden and “Speak” by Laurie Halse Anderson are about. It was a coincidence that I read these two books one after another, but they are really both very very similar. They both deal with girls who have gone through great trauma, who have been hurt by others and must slowly rebuild their trust in others, in themselves, and in life.

“So much to tell you” is based on a true story- which is just too dreadful to think about. Marina is a girl who has stopped speaking after something terrible happened to her. She has been shipped off to boarding school, in the hopes that she will start reconnecting with others. The book is her journal, handed to her as an English assignment. Through it, we meet Marina’s roommates, family and teachers. I like that the way the journal is written is not very eloquent or clever: it’s written just like your average 14-year-old would write. Marina at times seems a little naïve- her self-loathing makes her admire the other girls in a way that perhaps is a little unmeasured. I believe, however, that this is because her pain is so deep. Unlike Melinda in “Speak”, Marina never really had a sense of normalcy and belonging. She isn’t quite as well-developed as other girls her age. However, she’s witty, perceptive and smart in her own way. Throughout the book, we’ll see how she starts coming out of her shell, becoming less and less invisible to others, and to herself.

While “Speak” is not based on a true story, it may very well be. The event that changes Melinda’s life is something that, unfortunately, happens a lot to teenage girls. Unlike Marina, Melinda doesn’t stop speaking entirely. She just draws into herself and starts speaking as little as possible. While in her book Marina begins to slowly start communicating in alternative ways, in “Speak” we see Melinda draw into herself more and more. Things get much worse before they get any better. It doesn’t help that everyone in her school is mad at her, and that none of the teachers understand her trauma. In Marina’s case, people know her story and feel pity. In Melinda’s, no one knows and no one understands. Melinda, however, seems to be much stronger than Marina. She is very very witty, and (even though deep down she really wants friends), she has enough sense to hate everyone back. The humour with which she describes the nuances of high school made me laugh out loud a few times. The ending of the book made me cry- and I almost NEVER cry with books.

The two books are incredibly similar. They are both about 14-year-old ninth graders. Each of them has a favourite and helpful teacher. Each of them watches her classmates try out for the musical/play. Each of them is screaming though no one can hear. I can’t help but wonder how different Marina and Melinda’s stories would have been had they had a chance to meet. Would Melinda teach Marina not to be so hurt by everyone, and to laugh at them instead? Would Marina show Melinda the hidden kindness in others? But that is the point, isn’t it? Even if these two girls had gone to the same school, they probably wouldn’t have noticed each other. How could they? Neither of them speaks.